striving for perfection makes me a bad mom...

I've come to realize lately that striving for perfection actually makes me a worse mom, instead of the better one that I am trying so hard to be.

When I try so hard to fit that perfect mold of motherhood that 'they' seem to make look so easy, I cause more damage than good in my family's and my life.

The tidier I try to keep my house, the quicker it seems to get messy.

The more I desire quiet and calm, the louder I seem to snap and yell at my kids, which in turn causes more chaos and noise!

The more I try to keep control, the more I seem to lose it.

This need and constant pressure to have things in order, clean and calm, makes me a not-so-great mom.  In fact, at times it makes me a horrible mom.

When I should be enjoying my kids laughter and games, I find myself frustrated with the messes they are creating.

When I should be playing with my kids, I find myself being pulled instead to the dirty dishes and laundry that never seem to end.

When I should be having quiet time with my Abba, I find myself drawn to the to-do list that runs constantly in my head.

Why is it so hard to see what's really important in the everyday moments of our lives?

Why do I always think the dishes are more important than the tiny hands pulling on my legs?

And that the stuff that needs to get done is more important than spending time with my precious family and with the One who gave them to me??

I want to be a better mom.  I want to be the mom my kids deserve.  And I can't be that until I quit trying so hard.

Until I quit caring what other people think, or say or do.  Until I start caring more about what my kids think than about what the world thinks.

Because when it comes down to it, all that really matters is what my kids will get out of these years.

I will survive these years, these hard, exhausting years, and someday look back on them as a fond memory of time gone by.  (Right?!?)

But my kids...  My kids need to thrive in these years.  They are growing and learning and shaping the very core of who they are, and who they will become based on these years.

And THAT is why I need to stop trying so hard.

I need to stop trying so hard to be the perfect mom, and instead focus on being the best mom for my kids!

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